Mississippi Rod was diagnosed with having a stupid scalp. During a big drought during the summer, Rod was lounging around when his hair just started falling out.
“Scalp,” Mississippi Rod said. “Why you gone and done a dumbass thing like pushin’ my hair outta my follyculls.”
“It’s really hot up here, Rod. I figured this hair was weighin’ you down.”
“Scalp, if you wasn’t way up there on my head, I would bust your ass. You lucky. You a lucky damn scalp. Now put my hair back in there.”
“I, um, I’m not sure how to do that. I think your hair’s gone, Rod. I’m sorry.”
“You gon’ be sorry, dumbass sorry old scalp, makin’ me bald.”
Rod took one last swig of his Tennessee Sour Mash.
“G’night, scalp!” Rod crashed the bottle into his head. He slept better that night than the last one.